Tuesday, October 12, 2010

If you can't explain it simply, you don't have to

‘What would happen if I ever lost my loved ones? If mom, dad, my sisters, Iqra, or my gradnma, were to leave and move to heaven, how would I survive? How many tears would I shed before, I can finally get a hold of myself and move on with life? How long will it be till I can resist crying, and smile? Honestly smile? Would I ever be able to forget them? Would I want to forget them? I wouldn’t. I’d remember them every day of my life. It must be very hard to lose someone so close.’  Those were her last thoughts as she wiped the tear from her eye, closed them and turned over to get some sleep and a break from such painful thoughts.

That what I just shared up there with you, was written from a perspective of someone who has never lost someone very close to her heart. She has seen many deaths, and heard many cries but all from a distant. She doesn’t know what it’s like to lose someone so dear. God has blessed her with a loving family and some loving friends and she thanks Him for this blessing every day. She doesn’t know how much sorrow can be filled in those tears. She fails to understand how the memories that once made a person laugh till they couldn’t breathe can also haunt them so they can barely sleep. She also doesn’t know that the heart can become so heavy that it feels like it weighs a Ton, and the weight doesn’t lift off till much later. She doesn’t share any experience of a Great loss what so ever. However, she has a talent that many of us lack. She has the courage to show compassion. I use the word courage because every body cares and everybody has compassion, but many hide it or are just too ignorant to show it. She may not know what it is like to lose a best friend or a sibling or a parent but she cares for those who have. She truly respects their courage because she knows that if she can get her eyes to tear up by only imagining a great loss, then the people who have actually lost must be miserable to the extreme. This girl realises one thing about herself, that we sometimes fail to do so. She knows that she is a human being and specifically of the female gender which is the more complex one. As a human being, she knows that she is complicated beyond belief. She also realises with some disappointment that as a perplexed human who has not yet been through a great loss, she can not understand the pain. Yet, she tries and many times fails miserably. But she’s there to listen, if you want to talk. She has two shoulders to offer where you can wipe your tears. If you prefer Kleenex she has those too. She can give you as many hugs as you need. She will not say, “I understand.”, “I know how you feel” But she cares and she would like you to let her care for you. She is willing to look up at the stars with you in silence if that’s what you prefer and help you find the one you’re searching for. She doesn’t like to see people in pain whether she feel it or not, but she’ll do everything in her power to try and understand the sorrow and ease the pain. That is all.

This is yours truly sharing with you what's on her mind. =]


  1. She is truly a great person.

    LOL @ "She knows that she is a human being and specifically of the female gender which is the more complex one."

    Beautifully written. && you're right, sometimes we don't have to have experienced something to know it can cause pain and or hurt. And those people who can feel even a slight proportion of another's pain or comprehend the grief it may be causing them are truly blessed with a great gift.


  2. =D When I wrote that it wasn't with the intention of making the reader LOL! It's a true fact. And Yes i agree with you..or I agree with your comment that agrees with my post. WE AGree with each other! there. Some people who have been through a LOT don't feel comfortable sharing their grief with someone who hasn't and that's fine, but they should at least realise that the person cares. And in that moment of grief, that's all the person needs right? Someone to care?

  3. This line really stood out for me "She will not say, “I understand.”, “I know how you feel” But she cares and she would like you to let her care for you
    With many people those words roll of their tongue like a 6 six years olds butt rolls down a slide, and its just not right, esp when you dont know jack all about what that person is going through and you're just saying it, because, well..for the sake of it.

    Top post!

  4. Thank you! And yes, when people repeatedly keep saying 'i know', i understand...it reallly ticks me off and the person who's upset, gets even more ticked off -__-