“Yes there are two paths you can go by, but in the long run there’s still time to change the road you are on”

 

Drip drip..

She focused her undivided attention to the sound of the raindrops splashing against her window in a random fashion. Some times the wind would assist them, and they would splatter here and there at a rapid speed. And, sometimes they would find their own way down to the glass, and trickle slowly down the vent that lay between the glass and the hood of the car. Too soon, the slight pitter patter of the rain turned into a chaos of loud thumps. Every raindrop hit the window like tiny rocks. Asma turned the switch inside her car, and the wipers began to push away the drops rhythmically. Her eyes surveyed the movement of the wipers from left to right to left, until she felt a shadow sneak in through the corner of her vision. She turned her head only to find a smiling face drenched in rain peaking inside her car. She saw the tiny droplets of rain trickling down his forehead, down the tiny buttons on his soaked shirt, to – she stopped. Saved by her modesty, she didn’t follow the raindrops down to where ever they were headed, and immediately looked back up into his eyes. She pressed the button with her finger, to open the window just a smidge, so she converse with the drenched man. “Salam alikum, I’m looking for directions to the Al-sahara mosque. Could you assist me?”

***

Nine years and counting, ‘I would not want my life to change at all’, he thought as he rested his head against his chair watching two hands wash those dishes. He moved his gaze to the ring on the finger, and two gold bangles striking against each other as the hands moved under the running water. He smiled. Nope. not one bit. He loved where he was. He loved the room he was in. He loved what he saw. He loved and was always thankful of all that he had gained since that day in the pouring rain. What he loved most was not knowing that trying to find his way to the house of Allah (swt), in the pouring rain Allah united him with his half deen. His zawjati.

 

------------------------------

Title: Stairway to heaven – Led Zeppelin

“Your reminiscences transport the soul To memory?s Paradise?its future goal.”

 

Dim and dark,

that’s how she liked her room at the end of a long day.

Leaving the brightness, the whispers, the reminders outside the door,

just embraced by her own fatigue, she collapses on the bed.

Her eyelids close her off from the outside world as she let’s out one small sigh.

Soon she could hear her own breath going in and out, the tranquil silence of the room,

as each train of thought halted at its station, to rest for the day.

It was nice like that. To be able to hear your own thoughts and breath, just to know that you are still going.

She flushed all of the day’s junk out of her mind, sweeping up the incomplete and unnecessary information from every corner.

She locked the door, tossing the key in her bag,  and walked out onto the softest bed of green grass you could see for miles.

A body comes and stands close by, tapping her shoulder with the softest touch.

“Oh you came!” she feels the excitement in her voice as she looks over her shoulder.

“I’ve been waiting for you! Do you have it?” she gets straight to the point.

“Have what my dear?”, the person looks at her with puzzlement.

“The book! Remember?”, she eagerly speaks.

“The book? Why, you’ve had it all along my dear”, the person says with a slight amusement in her voice. Perhaps she is smiling. “It’s right behind you.”

She hurriedly turns her head to find it. Her eyes focus in something small surrounded by many rays of light. She focuses in on the object, as her ears wave in a screeching sound. Her eyes bring in some flashing words..numbers..

7:00am!

Another day another dawn.

 

*****

I apologise to all my readers for not having a piece up in the last few weeks. I just got finished writing my exams, so there will be more writing coming up soooon! Hope you lovely people around the world, are having a great week! :)

With lots and lots of love,

Yours Truly x

Where there is Haq, there is batil. Where there is right, there is wrong. Where there is Hussain, there is Yazeed.

 

 

Afghan Shia Muslim's cry near dead and injured after explosions during a religious ceremony in the centre of Kabul on December 6, 2011. At least 30 people were killed in an explosion at a Kabul shrine where Shia Muslims were marking the Day of Ashura Tuesday, an AFP photographer saw. The blast came in the city centre where Shias had gathered to carry out religious rituals to mark the day, a public holiday in Afghanistan. Click here for full report.

When the whole dunya is against you, yet Allah(swt)’s blessing keep your faith alive, and powerful as ever… you know you’re on the right path.

Happens every year, and each year the population of commemorators increases.

“You sometimes think that you want to disappear, when really you just want to be found”

 

Normally I would write a post on political issues, or some serious life problems, or just share some wisdom of the Quran or the Ahlulbayt. Sadly, this week I am too exhausted to write anything about anything. Call it procrastination, being caught up with school work, or just…lack of motivation. This week, out of any has been the toughest. It’s come down to the point where I don’t have the energy to carry on without looking back, or even do what I do best: Rant, and make myself feel better. At the end of this week, I just want to pause everything. Then rewind back to the winter of 2006, and fast forward to where ever the happy days are. At the end of this week I have nothing to share with you of my own, but something different for a change:

 

 

 

 

 

                     

 

If even one of these made you smile, or relax your brows even for a millisecond, it’s mission accomplished for yours truly. :)

Happy Thursday guys!

Stay blessed! x

Dear hot insecure girls and your bad boys

Listen up ladies and men. This guy's got a lot of heat!

“A state of blur. A flash of lights. A moment of silence”

 

 

There’s a picture in my room. A portrait of a man, his wife and two kids, sitting up formally and elegantly straight. Their sparkling smiles looked as if they were painted on. There is something about the happiness and simplicity in the four corners of the portrait, that just doesn’t seem right. There is too much perfection in that picture. More perfection than a family ought to have. The little girl’s hand in her mother’s palm makes a bond too strong to be real. The wisdom in the father’s eyes, seems farfetched. The twinkling youth in the boy’s eyes really tugs at the heartstrings.

Or at least that’s what it looks like after twenty years gone. Familiar faces turn into strangers. What you always thought was something, becomes nothing. Sweet memories converge into bitterness. And as I hold these strange faces near to my heart, a tear makes its way down my cheek and its all gone…once again.

***

“Do you think it was a suicide?”

“Doesn’t seem that way. All we found was the victim’s body, and this old family portrait”

 

- Yours Truly

“Courage doesn't always roar. Sometimes courage is the quiet voice at the end of the day saying, "I will try again tomorrow.”

 

 

At the end of the day,
after all the work is done;
At the end of the day,
as we watch the setting sun;

After all the trials,
and after all the pain;
After all the struggles,
to make it through the day;

I thank God for peace and rest,
and for little smiles from you;
I thank God for rising stars,
and for little hugs from you;

For there is no blessing,
such as this I found so true:
It’s such a pleasure just walking home
at the end of the day with you!

*****

Breaks are important. After a long stressful month where you may have found yourself at the brink of a sort of “depression”, the best thing to do is to just wind it all down. Forget the yesterday, and don’t try to peak at the tomorrow. Take any tangled strings of thoughts, and scrape them out of your mind. Let everything be a blur at the back of your head, and don’t try to make sense of it, because in all honesty, you will probably drive yourself insane. Close all that needs to be closed: books, laptop, doors, blinds, and your eyes. Just breathe it all out, and live the moments you have in tranquility.

How do you spend your well deserved weekends/holidays?

*****

Happy almost-the-end-of-the-week everybody!

Stay blessed. :)

______________________

Title: Quote by Mary Anne Radmacher.

Poem: Author Unkown. Found here

“Some things and some people in our lives are a blessing, and on this Eid-ul-Adha, let’s pray that they stay forever”

 

 

"Surely Abraham was an example, obedient to Allah, by nature upright, and he was not of the polytheists. He was grateful for Our bounties. We chose him and guided him unto a right path. We gave him good in this world, and in the next he will most surely be among the righteous." (Qur'an 16:120-121)

A very warm and blessed Eid Mubarak to all my Muslim brothers and sisters out there. Hope the sacrifices you made this year reach Allah and make you one of the pious mo’mineen in His eyes.

For those of you who had the magnificent opportunity to go for Hajj (Pilgrimage) this year, Insha'Allah your Hajj will be accepted by the Almighty, and you will return to your homes safely with a pure heart and mind full of nothing but the love of Allah (swt).

As for those of us who did not get the opportunity to attend Hajj this year, let’s pray to Allah (swt) that we get that chance soon, so we too can ask for forgiveness and cleanse ourselves from the dirt of our bad deeds and wipe away the dust of the Dunya from our eyes.

“Perform Hajj and Umrah rituals in order to be safe and sound, to make a better living for your family and make a better life.” (Imam Zain-ul-Abideen a.s)

 

Eid mubarak. :)

 

Yours Truly x

TIME IS RUNNING OUT!!

 

Dr. Usama Al-Atar

I’ve already addressed the issue of Shaykh Usama Al-Atar being imprisoned by the Saudi Government under false charges.

I just need everyone who reads this to sign the petition at:

http://www.change.org/petitions/ministry-of-foreign-affairs-release-shaykh-usama-al-atar-immediately?utm_medium=facebook&utm_source=share_petition&utm_term=own_wall

I know that Shaykh Al-Atar is not Babar Ahmad but for the sake of humanity and justice, this is the least you can do!

God Bless.

 

Yours Truly

 

ps. I understand that a lot of us here are non Muslims or from different sectors of the same faith. But please do it in the name of Humanity. :(

Release of Sheikh Usama A-Atar from Detention in Saudi Arabia

 

"He amongst you who witnesses an evil, let him change (remove, stop) it with his hand. If unable, then with his tongue, and if unable, then with his heart, and this indeed is the weakest Iman."
- Prophet Mohammed

 

Hello/Salam Everyone,

Recently our residential Imam was arrested and beaten in Saudi Arabia while attending Hajj.
He was one of the biggest influence on Shi'a Muslims around the world, and the most kind gentleman I have ever encountered.

Today he needs our prayers more than anything! If you could kindly pray for his release and safe return home, our Edmonton Shi'a Muslim society would be forever grateful to you.

Remember, Oppression is wrong under any circumstance on anybody. If you care for humanity, please take action, even if that just means sparing a prayer for him.

If you care about humanity, your religion and if you know Dr. Usama personally, then please sign this petition! Time is running out, as his court hearing is today!

http://www.change.org/petitions/ministry-of-foreign-affairs-release-shaykh-usama-al-atar-immediately?utm_medium=facebook&utm_source=share_petition&utm_term=own_wall

From one human being to another.

“Advance in goodness and rise to the horizon. Sublimity wanted from Muslims”

 

Positive Reinforcement doesn’t get any better than this:

Enjoy!

 

Advance in goodness and rise to the horizon
Sublimity wanted from Muslims
You are the symbol of pearls and glories
Abandon the mud and rise to the sky
You will never see a night without a star
Run up the flags and go ahead Light the lamp and be determined
Overcome the terrors however dark they are
Always advance by your firm will
Be a mole and symbol for people
Who seeks glory and sheds tears
Under the cover of dark night
Or raises dust in the enemy's face
Heaven has perfect magic
Always advance by your firm will
And be like mole and inspirational symbol for people

 

Happy Thursday Peeps!

:)

Thank God it’s Thursday!

 

If you take one step towards God, he will take two towards you. If you come to Him walking, He will come to you running.

Even though it would not harm God in the least if the whole of mankind abandoned faith and goodness, God is overjoyed when one of His servants, lost in faithlessness and sin, comes back to Him. Imagine a mother who has lost her baby in a crowd and is nervously searching for it. Imagine now her joy when she finds her lost baby. When a servant of God returns to Him after being lost in faithlessness and sin, the joy of God is more than seventy times greater than the joy of such a mother.

- “Repent, For Allah is Merciful” [Ahmad Shafaat]

**************

People start their Monday morning, by constantly reminding themselves that Friday is only five days away. As the week goes on, the tension builds up and we reach Wednesday with the thought: “Half way there!” We somehow manage to cut through the last couple of days to reach the long awaited Friday; and then what?

After a couple of nights out with friends, and family on the weekend I would feel relaxed momentarily, until it would hit me that it was going to be Monday again shortly! The tension would start knocking on the door, the slow rising of the stress level, the constant emails about one deadline or another, and this meeting or that. It was all a never ending vicious circle and I wanted out! The worst part of it all, I was neglecting religion. Big time! Whether those meetings and deadlines really kept me away from mosque, or it was an excuse that I had become prone to using, I couldn’t tell. All I knew was that I wasn’t getting anywhere. No matter how many papers I got rid of, my stack only got higher. No matter how many meetings I attended, my schedule only got busier, and no matter how many hours of work I put into meeting the quotas, they only increased. Ridiculous amount of work and it resulted in increasing stress level, and decreasing faith level. Maybe this goes without saying but, there was a problem.

Until one day, after a serious discussion with a friend about the work load and the stress, she advised a medication: Mosque. She said I needed a break. To put down my pen for once, push in my chair and just walk out. She asked me to attend a weekly program at the mosque with her on a Thursday night, consisting of prayers, supplications and a lecture. The amount of force and insistence she put into that offer, I didn’t dare say no.

So there we were at the mosque on a Thursday, joined together by the prayers first. [To get into the detail of how magical  it felt during the prayers is going to take you up to Fajr to read so I’m not going to go there. But those of you, who have been in my place, know exactly what I’m talking about!] We then dispersed to various spots and followed the reciter in the supplications. Again, same feeling. Lastly, the lecture. Here is the magic I want to share with you. The sheikh started off his lecture with a little something like this:

“We all have a busy schedule: Kids, School, Work. And it builds up tension. We are only human, and the constant stress that builds up on us is really overwhelming. It’s a never ending cycle. But when we take those few hours out of the week, to come here and get back in touch with what is really important, the cycle doesn’t seem so intimidating anymore. You leave feeling mentally strong, solid in your Imaan, and most importantly, you feel like your questions for the week have been answered. It’s miraculous. The sheikh doesn’t know what you are thinking or worrying about, yet he says something or another that hits that spot in your heart, and leaves you wanting more, thus you keep coming back here to the same place, same time, every week.”

After leaving the mosque that night, all I could think about was the lecture. There really was something about the whole environment that had me in the zone, away from thinking about all the work load and stress, and it certainly left me wanting more. The peace. The tranquility. The relaxation. The satisfaction. It was all too profound, and nothing compared to what the two nights out with the friends could get me.

Indeed, I returned every Thursday since then. Walking in with minimum energy, and a million questions in my head, yet walking out feeling more pure and satisfied than ever. There’s still meetings ahead, but its okay. I can handle it. There’s all those papers still waiting for me on my desk, no problem I can finish them. The rush of energy and faith that flows through your body is just astounding! God bless my friend for pull me out of that vicious circle. And if any one of you is reading this and nodding your head, because you can relate. Try it! I dare you!

Hope you lovelies have a great weekend! =)

Happy Thursday!

Yours Truly x

"If people knew that Cuba, China, Iraq, and Afghanistan had more women in government than the United States of America... people would be upset"

 

 

Need I say more...?

 

Take something from it and have a good weekend! x

“Tell me how many beads there are In a silver chain Of evening rain, Unravelled from the tumbling main...”

 

What is it about raindrops on a windowpane that is so pleasing to the eye? Tiny circles of water splattering on an ordinary window. Yet, the clarity of them makes the whole world on the opposite end a blurry vision. There is the whistling of the winds, the swirling of the fallen leaves, the splash of the puddles, the tip-taps of the fall boots, and the neon colors of the umbrellas. Yet the drops of silver aqua, as soundless as ever take away the attention from all other aspects of the season, as if they have something far better, far more mystic to offer. In each splattering droplet there is a sort of hope. A hope that if today is grey tomorrow may not be. If today bears a suppressing hurdle of clouds, tomorrow may bring a line of magical colors stretching beyond the horizon. If today is a depreciation of rain, tomorrow maybe the appreciation of sun.

They say: “when it snows you have two choices: You can shovel, or you can make snow angels”. But when it rains, its best to just…let it rain. Liberate yourself of all the hardships which rob you of your tranquility and let it all wash away.

*****

Hope you all are doing good. :)

 

Yours Truly x

 

_________________________

Title: Quote by Thomas Lovell Beddoes

I..I love you like a love song baby!

 

Last week I was on the phone with someone, arranging an interview for a job opening. We talked about the job: Hours, Tasks, Salary etc.. Then we decided to exchange some contact information. She asked for my address, email address etc. to get started on the verification process. In return I asked her for her Email address:

“So can I get your email?, In case I have any questions, I don’t want to call you constantly”, I joked.

“Oh sure honey! It’s “darlingwife@------.com”, she said politely.

“Awh. That’s cute”, I commented smiling.

“I’m getting divorced! It’s called sarcasm”, she laughs.

“Oh.”

****************

Leave it up to Yours Truly to put herself in such awkward situations.  --__--

On the other hand, MAN! how do people take such serious situations so lightly!

Hope you loveliees have a great weekend!

 

Yours Truly x

“What’s your favourite strawberry ice-cream with cherry on top?”

 

In my life I have been asked many questions. [okay lame start I know. but its Monday, give me a break] From my name, to my field of study, to my phone number. Common questions that we come across everyday, and many times a day. Then there are questions that we used to ask each other oh! back in the day: what is your favourite so and so? Ah! Speaking of favourites. I once watched a video of a man standing on the sidewalk asking random people who walked by, this one simple head-scratching question:

Who is your favourite person!?

The face expression on the people’s face was like they had been struck by a baseball on the head. Favourite person? Is there such a thing…?

We are surrounded by people we love, and people that love us. But to pick one of these people and say that He or She is my favourite? I don’t know how I would tackle that question to be honest with you. And what about the other way around..?

Who’s favourite person are you?

Right of the bat, we all would think: “No one!” because we don’t think that we can have that big of an impact on someone. I mean someone may love us and all, but am I their favourite…?

A daughter would wish she is her Daddy’s favourite.

A wife would wish she is her husband’s favourite.

An employee would wish he/she is his/her boss’s favourite.

But can we really erase the uncertainty from this question…?

That’s what relationships are, are they not? A sky of uncertainty, with Fireworks of pleasure. Fireworks of sorrow. Fireworks of patience. Fireworks of passion.

And if you are sitting there wondering about how to answer that question, chances are you are attached to many love strings. And that is a blessing!

************************

Hope you’re having a great week lovelies <3

 

Yours Truly x

 

This one is for you Hot chocolate!

A heads up to my dear future Hubbband!

 

 

Since the topic of Marriage has been let out the bag, I thought I’d make a “ He must have/be” list of my own:

1. He must be funny [if you can make me laugh, life is going to be a LOT less stressful!]
2. He must be clever [Can tell the difference between tuna and chicken]
3. He must have awesome hair :D
4. He must NOT be a sports fanatic. [We will end before we even start!]

Hope that was somewhat interesting for you guys, coz for me none of that matters. Praying five times a day, fasting, keeping a strong Emaan and being educated will do just fine for me. :)

Although Number 3 and 4 would be a bonus. :D

 

Hope you all are doing great! <3

 

Yours Truly x

Just one thing…

 

If there was one thing I could get for you, it would be the memories of our past.

If there was one thing I wish you had held on to, it would be your Imaan.

If there was one thing I wish you had not lost your faith in, it would be the Almighty.

If there was one thing I could give back to you, it would be your Haya.

If there was one place I could take you, it would be the house of God.

If there was one thing I could ask you to do, it would be to ask for forgiveness for yourself.

If there was one thing I could do for you, it would be to bring you back on Sirat-al-mustaqeem.

“If you don’t know where you’re going, any road will get you there”

 

You know when there is that time when you feel totally lost and really on the edge? Well I don’t know how others get over that fear, or find their way but this is what I do:

When I feel completely lost and on the edge, right about to fall off I stick with nothing but these few words:

After remembering these words my heart starts to feel much better and things start to make sense. It gives me courage to step back from the edge, and try to sort out whatever it is that has me puzzled. It just…helps you know? The feeling I get after remembering these words is like the feeling you get when a friend gives you a warm hug. Normally, I would just turn to my friends for a hug when I’m feeling lonely, but when they’re not around I turn to these words.

How do you get over that feeling? :)

 

Hope you loveliees are having a good week. I’ll catch up with you all soon hopefully!

 

Take care

 

Yours Truly x

“The headlights are on, while the engine is turned off”

 

 

On the train:

Me: This is way too early for me.

J: haha! get used to it Miss. Starting Wednesday, the 6:00 alarm sound is going to be your like music to your ears!

Me: UGH!

J: Let’s grab some coffee yeah?

Me: Sounds good!

At the coffee shop:

J: I’ll have the vanilla mocha tall please.

Me: I’ll have a double double tall as well, thanks!

J: *Makes disgusted face*

**They wait for the orders.**

 

The cafeteria lounge:

J: So are we on a date or something?

Me: *speechless* where in the world did that come from?

J: Because uhmm you didn’t pay for anything.

Me: *lols*

 

You know you are tired when…:P x

Mabrook Mabrook Mabrook

 

 

 

A very very very warm Eid mubarak to you lovelies in Advance. :)

I want to write the post regarding Eid, but I don’t know what to say. Eid is a joyful event that you can write a million things about:

• I could do a recap on the month of Ramadan.
• I could mention the fact that our community collected over $30000 for the Ramadan fund, in a matter of 25 days. Masha’Allah!
• I could write about the 24 cupcakes I have to make for Eid.
• I could write about the Eid gifts I have bought for my siblings, that they don’t know about yet. :D
• I could write about how much I love the Henna design on my hands.

And I could go on and on and on, but I don’t want to. I want to read/hear about what you have planned for Eid. How did your shopping turn out? What are you going to cook? What are you going to wear? How are you going to spend this exciting occasion with your loved ones?

I hope Eid 2011 turns out more joyful and blessed for you all. May your fasts and prayers in the blessed month of Ramadan be accepted, and may Allah reward you for your good deeds in the blessed month. They say that the last 10 days of Ramadan are the most important, Allah is more forgiving in these last few days, so please make the most of it. Fast, pray, recite Quran, and do what you can to strengthen your relationship with Allah (swt).

As for me? I will post a proper post up after Eid, until then…

 

Peace. Love. Nap time. ;) x

Say something nice :)

 

This is so incredible!

What would you say?

 

Have you been wondering…?

 

 

Have you been wondering where I have been for so long? If you have, then I must say that you should find something better to do with your time.

You see, the last night I spent at my aunt’s house I couldn’t sleep. When the one year old falls asleep, the baby wakes up, and when she falls asleep, the one year old wakes up and the trend goes on all night. Just watching my poor aunt hold one kid after the other and sometimes both in her arms while her eyes are burning red, due to lack of sleep I just couldn’t leave her all by herself and go home. So, I asked her to come along with me, and spend sometime at my place. She agreed, we packed and now it’s been a week since we’ve been home. Home sweeeeeeet home.

The night I got home, I received my work schedule on email and it turned out I was starting work the very next day. Since then I have either been working, or taking care of kids or been going to the mosque, every chance I get. And with the fasting and hot weather, by the time I get home from work or put the babies to sleep, or finish my Isha prayers, I am too exhausted to even lift my finger, let alone type up a blog post. So here I am justifying my absence, and hoping that you will understand. Now, lets change gears:

 

• University is starting from September 7, 2011. I’m excited, but I’m nervous. Very very nervous. I was telling my friend about how nervous I am and he told me to take it easy, and that I am going to love my first year. Well, I’m holding on to his words and let’s hope it turns out that way, insha’Allah.

 

• Laylat-ul-Qadr just passed. And what an amazing night it was. The mosque held and all-nighter, and we did prayers and read supplications together from after Isha prayers, all the way to Sehri. I’m trying to come up with words to describe how  it was, and how much peace and contentment we all felt in our hearts when we left the mosque in the morning, but I can’t. My words are not nearly enough to describe how glorious and peaceful my experience was. Subhan’Allah.

 

Those are the only updates I can think of from the top of my head. I just glanced at the time on the bottom right corner, and now I’m panicking because I have work at 8 am tomorrow, and I haven’t got one bit of sleep all day. So I’m going to have to leave you now. I had a few other things to add, but maybe another time.

Take care my lovely readers, and followers and have yourself a lovely week. Until next time…

 

Adios babies! x

An art. An eye. A passion.

 

We all like being inspired. By family, friends, teacher, celebrities, religion, education. Wherever the eye crosses a sight which sends that warm feeling of pleasure to the heart, and clicks in the tiny cells of the brain, it begins to run in the blood and becomes a passion. Whether it be recreational, technical, literary, historical or whatever else, it becomes that one thing that makes us feel organized in this chaotic world. A place, or an activity we can turn to when we need a break. A motivation. An inspiration. Maybe even a tiny voice inside the head that constantly reminds us to keep our balance and avoid falling off the track. Something that keeps us connected to the world, and when need be, disconnect us from the surroundings. Flipping through magazines, t.v channels, radio stations or when driving on the boulevard at night watching the bright flickering Ads and billboards, we are surrounded by passion. Other people’s passions. Though, an advertisement about shoes and 99 shades of L'Oreal lipstick may not run through our blood, it catches the eye. It ignites some energy and it feels good to know that someone out there is passionate enough about something to boldly speak it out to the world.

What’s your passion? :)

 

Yours Truly x

That sparkle in your eyes…

 

There is nothing more fun than giving a shower to a toddler. Their tiny little bums slipping and sliding in the tub while you spray them with some lukewarm water. As the first spray of water hits their dry body, the face expression is priceless. It’s like they think that they are drowning, so they reach their hands up and jump for air. haha! Throw in some toys so while  you shampoo them they keep distracted. Spray them at the most unexpected time to catch those exciting laughs they let out. But when/if you ever give a baby a shower don’t forget to make sure the water is warm before you spray them. Don’t do what I did and shower them with ice cold water for the first two minutes and then stand there wondering why on earth are their legs shivering. Wrap them up in a warm and soft towel and cuddle their tiny little body tight as they dry up.

What’s the most wonderful experience you have had with kids? :)

 

Yours Truly x

ps. To all the Moms out there: Apologies if I missed some major steps, I’m not actually a mother. :P

Silent nights

 

On nights that my thoughts are flying all around in my head unwilling to form a proper blog post for my lovely readers. I shall leave you with the thoughts of others. These happen to be words my heart can instantly connect with. Maybe you can relate too…

 

“Call it a clan. Call it a tribe. Call it a family. Whatever you call it. Whoever you are, you need one.” - Unknown

 

Yours Truly x

Marriage can wait lets have kids first!

 

So I’ve been away from home for three weeks now. I have been living at my aunt’s place who lives in a city four hours away from home. She just had a new baby girl, so I’ve been helping her around the house. She also has a six year old and a one year old and a husband who loves kids SO much, that he is almost like the fourth kid in the house! It is so entertaining and busy around here. Coming from a home where the youngest is eleven it is quite different being with little kids 24/7. I can barely keep track of  the days and nights nowadays, which is a good thing because it makes the fasting period go by super fast! 

Sometimes I feel really out of place in this house full of adorable children, because I have long passed that stage. Like I said, the youngest in my house is eleven years old so playing with toys and hearing constant screaming and crying is a very distant memory for me now. But I must say, that in my three weeks here with my aunt I have learned a lot of skills:

- Diaper changing

- Feeding toddlers

- Bathing toddlers

- Dressing up a newborn without twisting and turning her arms.

- Waking up at 2 in the morning to warm up a bottle of milk

- Helping my uncle put child proof locks in drawers and cabinets.

I have experienced it all. Sometimes while I’m holding the newborn in my arms and feeding her with the bottle at 2 in the morning, or chasing the one year old around the house trying to get him to wear sunscreen, I feel pretty frustrated. The first thought that comes to mind is: What am I doing here. But at the same time these are lessons that are going to come in very handy a few years from now when I have a family of my own Insha’Allah!

I can’t wait! :D

Now if you’ll excuse me, I’m going to go change because I smell like Baby Vomit.

 

Yours Truly x 

And I return to the skyscrapers and neon lights that I call home…

 

You know that feeling you get when everything is out of place? That weird feeling you get when you see people  close to you transform into people you don’t recognize. Perhaps, people you don’t want to recognize? The sinking feeling when people are within your reach but you can’t reach them. You know that feeling where you feel like there are little cracks on your heart like a spider web, and you’re caught in between them? And when you feel the sudden urge to cry but your “Pillow” isn’t there for you? That feeling that makes you just want to drop everything and sit on the couch in the dark with your head between your palms and just breathe?

I don’t have it.

 

Yours truly x

 

Read it. Ponder over it. Call it what your heart pleases.

 

 

Confused.

Empty.

That’s what I was feeling like a few days ago. Lying in bed, waiting for sleep to approach but it never came. Hearing friends talk but not listening to a word that escaped their mouth. Sitting in front of an empty Word screen waiting for the mind to spit out some words, but it remained blank. It was overwhelming. I was feeling lost . I had to be somewhere, but my destination was a blur. As sleep had betrayed me, I was constantly tired and never in the mood to speak to anyone. Going out, answering the phone, chatting with the family, I had put a stop on it all. Just me in my room, in my bed trying to figure out where and when I fell off the track. No luck. I felt like a lost bird, in search of peace. I dreaded the nostalgia, and I dreaded the sleepless nights. Keeping busy didn’t help. I would work stupidly long hours in a week, yet still feel empty inside, and more tired. Days went by with more thinking, more depression and more sleepless nights. I was feeling like I was on one side of the edge and everyone on the opposite side. There was no middle ground. And that place? I was still looking to find that one place, which would bring me peace. Where I could quench my thirst.

On Friday morning, around 11am while I was reading a novel I received a Text message on my phone: “Mosque at 1. You coming?”. Normally, I would make up an excuse and say no to any invitations I received during my period of “confusion”. But fate had other plans for me that day. For some reason, that I can’t remember now, I said Yes. I showered, drank a cup of tea and in a matter of half hour I was ready and waiting by the window for her car to show up. In the time I was waiting, I debated a hundred times whether I should call her up and tell her I can’t go to Jummah today, but I couldn’t.

The mosque was packed with people waiting for Salah. As I entered through the doors I could hear the Adhaan so I rushed inside, without stopping to talk to anyone and found a spot at the prayer mats.  I could feel everyone’s eyes staring me down, wondering where I had been for so long. Without further adieu the Salah began and we all stood up in unity, to began the prayers.  A feeling of peace and pleasure flowed through my mind, body and soul as I followed the Imam in the prayers and let myself open up to Allah (swt).  I had found a connection. A connection to something that made everything feel right. The Salah, followed by some supplications, and a lecture by the sheikh all happened over a period of 3 hours. But, where those hours went, I couldn’t keep track of. Lost in my profound state of tranquility I spent the day at the mosque reading up on some books, starting with the Holy Quran and ending with a brief talk with the Sheikh. I was back on track. I had made peace with myself, and my surroundings.  And what do you know? With my mind, body and soul finally at peace I slept like a baby that night.

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“And when my servants ask you about Me, then (say to them that) verily I am very near; I answer the prayers of the supplicant when he beseeches Me. So they should hear My call, and believe in Me, so that They may be led aright.”

(AL BAQARAH: 186)

 

Ramadan Mubarak to all my dear Muslim followers and readers. :)

Yours Truly x

“Wake up in the morning with the thought that something wonderful is about to happen”

 

 

 

If there was anything lonelier in this world than her, it would be the graveyard! The funny thing is, it is the loneliest place on earth, yet even the deceased have company all around them. Like I once heard in a film: “When we’re alone, we’re all together in that too”. So what makes her loneliness so difficult to watch? Oh she's looking at me now. Trying to figure out why on earth I’m staring at her, while my fingers are dancing around on the keyboard. I think you and I both agree that she can use some company. Let’s go talk to her. ;)

“What’s up?”

“Nothing! Why are you staring at me weirdo?”

“I was trying to figure out why you’re sitting here so depressed. Who died?”

“Shut up! Nobody died”

“Then, why the sad face?”

“It’s nothing. Don’t worry :)”

“Weren’t you supposed to be going out with your friends tonight? What happened to that?”

“It got cancelled. Some of them couldn’t make it. Some of us had an argument.”

“I see! Why don’t you go out and do something on your own? Go shopping, buy that new camera you wanted?”

“All alone? That’s no fun.”

“See that’s your problem right there. You think you always need someone to be with you, in order to enjoy yourself. That’s not always true you know. We only need others when we are at conflict with ourselves.”

“So you want me to lose my friends and be by myself? Isn’t that like being lonely?”

(Wasn’t staring out the window on a bright summer day, like being lonely..?)

“I’m not asking you to lose your friends. I’m just saying that you should befriend yourself. Spend time with yourself, get to know yourself, learn to be happy with yourself. Get what I mean Jellybean?”

“Would you like to do something with me?”

“This same offer that you made to me, maybe you should make to yourself.”

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Having friends is a blessing no doubt, but to take them for granted so much so that we become dependant on them is something to think about. Many times, and I say this from my personal experience with my lovely lovely friend RR, we need a friend to offer us their friendship before we can befriend ourselves. We need someone to show us the light and teach us how to love and appreciate life as it is. Other times, it is important to have a strong relationship with ourselves prior to making bonds with others. That way, when there comes a time in our life that we find ourselves to be friendless, there will always be that one person that we can count on: Our very own self. ;)

 

 Hope you lovely people are having a lovely week!

 

Yours Truly x

“R.I.P to the girl you used to see. Her days are over. Baby she’s over.”

I just took a doze of some cough syrup. Horrid horrid taste, in case you’re wondering. The syrup is meant to put me to sleep, so before the drowsiness kicks in let’s see how much I can write.

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Last week I was at work, and had just started my shift. I was positioned on the Sales floor in the Toddler/Baby section and there was a LOT of work to be done. New shipment had arrived early in the morning that day, so all the boxes had to be busted open, and the new stock had to be put out. That doesn’t sound so hard does it? Well, the rule of law is that whenever there is new shipment for the new season that  whole part of the shop has to change. That means, that I was supposed to rearrange the whole Toddler/baby section according to the picture sent to me by the Corporate Gods chilling on their Italian Leather sofas with their cigars lit up in the Company’s Headquarters down east. To make matters slightly more interesting, there was a HUGE sale going on in the store that week specifically on Toddler/baby merchandise to get rid of the Summer wear, to make room for the Fall items packed in those HUGE cardboard boxes just staring at me. You would think, the Head office people would have thought this through, yeah? However they failed to realise that the ‘Sale’ they had put on attracts the average shopper to the store like Dogs. Once the store puts up those BIG red sale signs, it gets bombarded with Shopaholics looking for the cheapest priced items in the most disgusting, unorganized, and rude manner. Complete chaos.

At the start of my shift, I decided to take a look around me at the shop and how the merchandise was organized at the moment, then look at the picture and see what had to be changed around. The shelves had to come down, and replaced by hooks and rods. The posters had to be changed, the manikins had to be undressed and redressed and so on. Without wasting any time I decided to grab a ladder and begin with the display manikins sitting on the top shelves. This required a lot of patience, since the ladder was BIG, and a bit wobbly, the top shelves were WAY up top, and the cherry on the ice: I am a wee bit scared of heights. As I carefully brought the ladder out and made my way through a crowd of people shopping and walking about, I gently placed it against the wall and locked it in place. Carefully climbing up the ladder, trying not to look down, I grabbed a firm hold of the manikins, which were quite small and light compared to the bigger ones that are used to display Men's/Women's clothes. As I was climbing my way down the ladder I felt a slight poke on my back. “Excuse me”, I heard a small voice behind me following the poke. Though I couldn’t see her, I thought her voice was very familiar. “Yeah. Just a second”, I answered politely. When I finally reached the the floor I placed the manikin on the floor and turned to look at the person who’s voice sounded so vaguely familiar.

Familiar she was. Alicia Demetre. My primary school friend. I went to school with for four years, but fate had other plans for us. After primary school I moved to the other side of town and we never saw or spoke to each other again. I took a good look at her and saw that she hadn’t really changed much in terms of her hair and style. But her eyes. They looked different. Ironic as that sounds, but eyes are one part of the Human body that remain the same since the day we are born to the day we die. So why did her eyes look different? Then, I realised it was really the look in her eyes that was one I had never seen on her. Back in Primary school she was always perky, loud and energetic, and the best quality in her: She was kind and simple; Always forgiving, and not one to get into trouble. I liked that about her. Now she looked concerned, scared, and as I took in the view of her full face, a bit ashamed as well. I wasn’t sure if she remembered me all that well, since it had been 7 years so I decided to remain in my Sales Associate role and treat her like any other customer. “Yes. How can I help you?”, I offered. “I’m looking for the Maternity section”.

As my eyes took a slight glance on her round belly sticking out, I was quite startled. Ms. Alicia Demetre. The super duper smart and clever student, receiving one award after another on her marvellous achievements in school. Ms. Class president going home with straight A’s at the end of every term. The one girl who truly knew the meaning of modesty while the others tended to be egotistical, looking for Maternity clothes?. At the moment I didn’t have time to think about how in the world she had ended up in this state, so I quickly answered her question, “The maternity section is straight ahead to your right.” When I looked her in the eye for the last time, the look changed from scared to shock. She recognized me. Her cheeks began to flush a red color, while I found myself constantly staring at the ground. “Can I help you with anything else?”, I offered in hopes of putting an end to this awkwardness. “No thanks! That’s all I had to ask”, she said politely and quickly walked away.

How, why, what or who got in to this mess, I will never know. Nor, am I going to judge her about the decisions she made, or her fate made for her.Surely Allah(swt) knows best. I merely wish her all the best with all the challenges she is facing, and is about to be faced with in the near future. =/

********************************

Anyways, the sleep is knocking at the door, and I shall answer. Hope you lovelies are having a beautiful Summer full of loads and loads of sunshine, and I will leave you with this cute randomness…

 

Haha!

 

Yours Truly x

 

_________________________________

Title: I’m ready for you – Drake.

Love at first sight BABY!

 

The title got your attention didn’t it ;)

Mind you I have a thing for unique, retro, weird looking, head turning clothes. So when my eyes spotted these in a fashion magazine a couple of weeks ago..It was love at first sight. I was startled that these historic pants that you might find hanging in the back of the closet of a 90 year old woman were back on the Red carpet. I stared at them with lustful eyes and and without wasting anymore time I went on my quest to find them. I did some research online, and apparently there are VERY few left in the city :O. The worst part was that I didn’t know what they are called. Some call them Aladdin Pants, some named them Ali Baba pants, and some just call them “Poofy pants from the 80’s”. All those names are suitable, but it became quite frustrating explaining it to Sales Associates at every damn store I entered. I searched about 15 stores and at the end, guess where I found them? The place I should have checked first and foremost: H&M. My Fashion Heaven. Even they had a limited stock left, as they were getting sold out pretty FAST. I rushed to grabbed a pair of cotton black ones as soon as my eyes spotted them. They fitted perfectly too! :D I even bought a couple of blazers to make a proper outfit!

Anyways, my craving and lust for these super comfortable, sexy pants has been satisfied. Thought I’d share the story of my quest with you all, and in case you are wondering…no I am not transforming my blog into a fashion/trend blog. I don’t have the creative mind for that. I thought it would be nice to post some nice and light stories for a while. Before I bombard you with some proper emotional, ‘got me thinking’ type of posts that I normally publish. ;)

So enjoy it while you can my lovelies. *kisses*

 

Yours Truly x

ps. Does anyone know what the proper name for them is?

“A girl’s best friend and her worst enemy: The hair”

 

Yours Truly is having a proper Gurly girl moment!

God bless the Man/Woman who invented this hairstyle. So good for bad hair days! Just a comb, and a hair tie. I will never have to stress about Messy hair on a Party night ever again thanks to this sexy beauty. Brush. Part. Grab. Tie. Spray. Texturize and Voilà! Done! What a life saver. :D

 

 

Peace.x

“You turned out to be the best thing I never had, and I’m going to always be the best thing you never had.”

 

As much as I love summer and its long sunny days, the dazzling sunsets, the beautiful rains, and the morning dawn, there is one thing that I find quite bothersome about this season. The lack of work. No school, no assignments, no due dates, and basically nothing to consume up your time. Don’t get me wrong, there are many things that one can do over the summer. In fact, some of them can be done only over the summer and not the rest of the year, such as:

• Vacation
• Visiting
• Summer courses
• Summer jobs
• Volunteering
• Blogging
• Reading

However, since the days are so long, there are always hours during the day when one does not have anything to kill the time. And in those moments, one cannot help but miss the days that were so consumed up by time. Deadlines, meetings, work, lectures, coffee dates with friends etc. Though, those days were very well hectic, they kept one busy. Busy enough to distract one from the thoughts of things that are missing. The moments that one had long ago, that will never return. People, who were long ago, and will never return. People who are too far, and one can’t reach.

You see  in the busy, hectic, stressful one was always so busy trying to catch up with the time that always seemed to be running away, that one could not be asked to pause and spare a moment for those distant ones. Sadly, now that one has so much free time lying around in their hands, one wishes to spend it with the distant ones. The distant friends that one hasn’t seen in oh ages. With all this time wasting away, one wishes desperately to put it to use, and kill that feeling of nostalgia, by being with the faraway, yet dearly close friends.

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Makes me smile, this concept of time…when life is busy, one keeps running on and on to catch up with the time that always seems so short. Then, when life is not busy, one has a whole ton of time on their hands,  and it becomes too difficult for one to hold it. So, how do you solve this conflict. How do you make these long moments full of nostalgia pass by? Do you try to reach those long distance friends? Email them? Call them? Heck book a flight and give them surprise? Is that how you break from those empowering gates of nostalgia? No you don’t. That would be well foolish. They don’t have time. They are busy with life. They have many things to consume up their time. There is no nostalgia surrounding them. Or is there…?

 

 

Yours Truly x

“Forgive. Forget. That's a lesson that we haven't learned yet. We try. We cry. But a day doesn't die till the sun is set.”

 

Remember those dawns that break out from the night, and all that remains of the night is the dew resting gently upon the grass? Those breezy summer mornings when the clouds are floating high in the sky like cotton candy? When you lay on the fresh green grass with bare feet and listen to the whispers of the grass needles? The hot summer days when the scorching sun rays burn the back of your neck, and a little breeze comes around and embraces your body ever so lightly, only to leave you yearning for more? Those afternoons when your bare feet take walks on the wet sand as the wavy waters creep upon your feet and trickle between your toes? The evenings as you watch the sun sink lower and lower into the lake, leaving the sky with the most dazzling shades of orange the eye has ever seen? And what about those nights, when the winds make the flowers dance and the trees swing under the starry sky, while the leaves hisser quietly amongst each other?

Those days are back…embrace them, admire them, cherish them, capture them into still frames, and make the most of them while you can. ;)

How has your Summer vacation been so far? :)

 

Yours Truly x

 

 

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Title: The day doesn’t die – Classified

Picture: My Summer vacation part one in Calgary, CA

“It takes one step to go from light to dark, and a thousand steps to go back.”

 

There is something about a doorknob. Something so insignificant and small has the ability of causing an itch in a person’s heart and mind. The sudden urge to hold the doorknob, twist it and open the door to see what’s on the other side? The curiosity, if not suppressed at the right moment, has the ability to take over a person’s nafs [ego]. Direct him or her according to their desires. Desires that require burning many bonds and relations in the fire of greed, and lead to nothing but ashes at the end.

**********************************

“Look. This is not a good idea. What you’re thinking is –”

“Is what? Wrong in the eyes of certain people? So be it”

“ How are you going to get through with this. You don’t even know where you are headed, and don’t forget the hell that would break loose when Mom and Dad find out your plans”

“They won’t. My life. My plans. They don’t need to know anything that’s not about them”

The amount of pain in his eyes was unbearable as those words escaped his tongue. He immediately lowered his gaze to hide the glistening droplets of guilt trying to escape his eyes. To some extent he knew that the step he was about to take was going to shake the earth beneath the feet of his loved ones. That’s not what he feared though. He was afraid of the regret he would be living with for the rest of his life, if he didn’t take this step. This was a “once in a life time” chance. Is there a choice?

“Will you please at least think about it once more before you go ahead with this plan? I can’t see you fall. That’s my only weakness”

For her, the pain was in her voice. The shaking voice barely able to make its way out. After every sentence she spoke, she would take a small sip from her cup to stop her throat from closing in. She couldn’t hold it in anymore. She wished to just grab him by the hand this very second, and drag him with her. She wanted to put him back on the right path, but she couldn’t. His changed perspective, his selfish words, his determination made it difficult to even breathe, let alone try to change his thoughts. Is it too late?

He sat there circling his finger around his cup, and gazing out into space. The only thought lingering around in his head was of his plans and future dreams. Something he would very shortly pursue. There was so much dust in his eyes, that it made his plans and destination look like heaven from afar. The dust of Dunya. Like cocaine and heroine it can also have quite a magical affect. Was it going to last forever?

After another quiet moment of sitting and thinking wishfully about the future he stood up from his seat and began to pack his belongings. As he packed his suitcase, she sat there helplessly staring at him. It was like watching someone fall into a well, except she couldn’t reach out and help him. He was preparing himself to go down that path purposely, and that was as painful as watching an innocent Humming bird being swept up by a Vulture.

“I’m taking my phone with me, in case you need to contact me. Though, I will be changing my number once I get there.”

He could not let a single thing holding him back. Not his parents, not his friends, not even his past. But he couldn’t say goodbye to his sister. She was testing his patience. He wanted to get her out of his sight, so she wouldn’t make him feel guilty about his decision. But each time he tried, her shaking voice and tearful eyes held him back.There was something about the way she stared at him, that made him want to turn back for the slightest second. Did he feel helpless too?

He drifted his gaze away from hers, trying to avoid any second thoughts and continued with his packing. The excitement he felt as he packed his belongings in his suitcase. The inner rush he felt each time he pictured himself reaching his destiny. The destiny that was still unknown. But he didn’t care. He was going to find it. He was ready to start a new life. A life where he would be the focus of attention, and no one else. That had become his motto for the last few years: Me myself and I. When he finished packing he gave her another look, as she still sat there staring at her feet now. It was too difficult to make eye contact with him for the last time. A sight that would be so unbearable, yet haunt her for the rest of her life without him. But there was one more thing she had to ask him. Just one last question before she lost him to the darkness of the Dunya.

“What are you going to gain by doing this? By hurting all your loved ones, do you really think you can live a happy life?”

He gave her one last glance before he lowered his gaze again, only this time to cover the shame in his eyes, and quietly walked out. As the door slammed behind him, her heart felt a sudden shock that made tears break out from her eyes like a gushing river. Staring at the door from which he had left, her eyes  were set upon the doorknob.

                                 *******************************

Allah (swt) says: "The worldly life is nothing but substance of deception."
“If the root of evil is treated and cured, all other maladies flowing from it will also disappear. A man overwhelmed by Hubb-e-dunya has no concern and time for the Aakhirah. Such a person having no care for the Aakhirah will not be bothered about righteous deeds nor will he abstain from evil. The one in whom there is Hubb-e-dunya has very little Fikr for the Deen. Increase in the degree of Hubb-e-dunya brings about a corresponding decrease in Fikr (concern) for the Deen. Total Hubb-e-dunya entails total lack of Fikr for the Deen.”

 

Yours Truly x

“There’s much more to life when you’re free. And in time you will find all the answers. Don’t have to lose your pride, hold on to what’s inside.”

 

Good Day!

How are you lovely strangers, readers, bloggers?

So summer here has O F F I C I A L L Y started *insert happy dance here*

With the start of a beautiful summer also comes a GREAT LOAD of Apathy. Too lazy to go out, too lazy to work, too lazy to clean blah blah blah! I’ve decided to AVOID apathy at any cost, so I’m going to start on a project: RENOVATION AND DECORATION starring THE BEDROOM!

To be honest with you I have never actually decorated a bedroom before. I would just take what I got and live with it. My room used to literally be just a single bed, desk, drawer chest, praying mat, and a little mirror, but recently I got a proper DARK brown coloured furniture set, so I thought I would decorate my room to compliment it! And since I’m a newbie to this whole thing, I need IDEAS, so give me what you got…

• Sophisticated
• Funky
• Dark
• Light
• Springy
• Summery
• Autumny
• Old school
• Revolutionary
• Preppy
• Abstract
• Romantic [just kidding]

Just throw ‘em at me, I would love to hear them all!

Thanks for all your help, you lovely bloggers you!

Take care ;]

Yours Truly x